interlocked

It was pretty funny how it started, Parker wouldn’t lie. It had been accidental at first, but it somehow worked. They somehow worked. And it felt good. Parker liked things that felt good.

The job the team was doing was a relatively simple one; there weren’t a lot of complex locks and security protocols to break through, sadly. Parker loved a challenge and loved when Hardison got a challenge too. No, this one was dependent on good old fashioned grifting by acting, which Hardison sucked at only a little less than Sophie’s stage acting; not that Parker was much better, but she could at least escape when necessary. The acting had been part of what got Parker, Hardison and Eliot into this situation in the first place.

Parker was doing her thing, picking pockets while Eliot played the role of an experienced barista (oddly, Parker discovered Eliot actually was an experienced barista. The coffees he made were pretty decent). And Hardison, well, Parker didn’t know what exactly the guy was doing. She probably should’ve checked in on him earlier, but that was hindsight at its best.

In any case, Parker found the mark and was about to approach him when she saw Hardison out of the corner of her eye listening to something a woman was saying to him. Parker tried to tune them both out and focus on her mission—to pickpocket their mark’s wallet—but she stopped when she heard what the woman was saying and the look of distress on Hardison’s face. It was subtle, but Parker considered herself somewhat of an expert on reading his expressions.

“Tell me who you really are or I expose you for the conman you are,” the woman said.

Now, Parker didn’t really think this was much of an issue. They’d all had an encounter or two like this, but for some reason Hardison wasn’t deflecting as usual. He made eye contact with Parker and his eyes were pleading for help. Weird.

Parker gave up on pursuing the mark for now and headed straight for Hardison. She mouthed the words ‘play along’ to him. He gave a short nod in acknowledgment. Parker didn’t have much of a plan, she mainly acted on instinct. Which is why as soon as she reached Hardison, she pulled him in for a kiss.

It was brief but Hardison kissed back. Parker still got that fluttering sensation in her chest, like she had the first time they’d kissed to escape a situation.

The woman gasped as they separated. She looked between them, scandalised. “I thought you were gay!”

Parker frowned, not expecting that reaction. “Don’t assume things about people.”

“He told me the barista is his boyfriend!”

Parker looked at Hardison, whose cheeks were flushed, which was confirmation enough that what the woman said was true. Parker made a mental note to get Hardison’s full story later. For now, though, there was only one way to resolve this. “The barista is his boyfriend,” Parker confirmed. “He and the barista are also my boyfriends.”

The woman did a doubletake. “Er.. what?”

Hardison seemed to have recovered thanks to Parker. “You’ve never heard of polyamory? It’s not exactly a new concept,” he said.

“O-of course I have! I just don’t believe you.”

Hardison sighed. “It’s because I’m black, right?”

Parker stifled her laughter. In any other context it wouldn’t be funny, but Parker knew Hardison enough to know it wasn’t an accusation. It was deflection. Deflection rarely failed, after all. Hardison knew that well.

The woman’s face went red. “No! Definitely not! I’m not racist!”

“If you say so,” Parker said. The woman really should’ve just taken Hardison’s initial rejection with grace.

But that clearly wasn’t the response the woman was after. She stomped her foot, like a child, and growled. “You people are infuriating! Whatever! Have fun with your poly-whatever! Ugh!” She stomped away. It was Hardison’s turn to stifle his laughter.

They couldn’t just give the act up there and then, though. The woman was still at the conference, though watching them from a distance. And there were other eyes on them too—those who had witnessed the scene.

Parker linked her hand with Hardison’s and led them over to Eliot. He wasn’t wearing his earpiece and had been too far away to witness what exactly happened, but Parker hoped that her and Hardison holding hands would tell him something was up. He was generally good at getting the picture fast.

“Hey babe,” Parker said, smiling at Eliot. She turned to Hardison, nodding slightly in expectation.

Hardison caught on. And oh boy his acting was poor but at least he tried. “Hey babe,” he also said to Eliot, stilted.

Eliot’s eyes widened. Hardison greeting him like that was probably the last thing he expected. Nevertheless, he schooled his expression into a smile. “Hey,” he said to them both. “Going on my break,” he said to the other barista before hanging his apron up.

When Eliot got around from the counter, he reached for Parker’s hand and intertwined them as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The three of them walked like that, three astride, out of the hotel conference room.

She wondered how it looked to the strangers they passed. Did they look like a natural polyamorous couple? Or did it look funny? Or perhaps both those things could be true.

Being in-between Eliot and Hardison like this was a strange and new but not an unwelcome feeling. If it had been anyone else it would’ve been uncomfortable, for Parker didn’t trust people. But this was Hardison and Eliot. They were exceptions and for good reason. The stuff they’d been through together… they’d had to have some degree of trust to make it happen. And naturally, that trust had only deepened over time and the more jobs they did.

Eliot and Parker were quick to free their hands, but Hardison didn’t let them and grabbed a hand from them both, placing himself in the middle this time.

“Security cameras,” Hardison explained.

Eliot frowned but nevertheless kept his hand connected until Hardison let go at a blindspot.

“What the fuck is going on?” was the first thing Eliot said. He gestured at Parker and Hardison and then at himself.

Parker quirked an eyebrow at Hardison. “That’s what I’d like to know too. That woman said you said Eliot is your boyfriend.”

Eliot’s eyes widened comically, much to Parker’s amusement.

“You said what? Why! What good reason could you possibly have!” Eliot threw his hands up.

Hardison raised his hands in what should’ve been a placating manner, but by Eliot’s clenched fists, it clearly wasn’t working.

“Relax, relax. Trust me. I have an explanation! It’s not like I wanted to do it!” Hardison defended. “Trust me, paired with you is the last thing I would want.”

“That was a lie,” Parker said. The words were out her mouth before she could even reconsider them. Not that she would’ve; subtlety in conversation wasn’t her forte.

“Was not!” Hardison said. “But anyway, do you want an explanation or not?”

Parker and Eliot nodded.

“She was hitting on me and when I said I wasn’t interested, she said she’d been watching me and would expose me for being a conman. I tried to de-escalate by implying I was gay by saying my boyfriend was here and wouldn’t be too happy about her advances. But then Parker came and kissed me, hence the,” he gestured to the three of them, “polyamorous relationship.”

Eliot turned to Parker, confused. “Why did you kiss him?”

“Because! It worked last time!” Parker said.

Hardison groaned. “Last time was under completely different circumstances though!”

“Wait—you two have made a habit of doing this?” Eliot asked.

“No,” Parker said at the same time Hardison said, “What, you jealous?”

A hint of red dusted Eliot’s cheeks. “No, of course not.”

“That was a lie,” Parker said. Hardison laughed but promptly stopped when Eliot shot him a glare.

“Whatever. Let’s just make it through this job and never speak of it again,” Eliot said.

Hardison and Parker both nodded and the three of them left the safety of the blindspot and returned to the hotel conference room. They didn’t hold hands this time though.

Parker and Hardison followed Eliot back to the coffee corner and before either of them could react, Eliot had pressed a kiss to Hardison’s cheek and then Parker’s. He then rushed away to put his apron back on and got back to making coffee.

Parker could only exchange a look with Hardison, who was equally, if not more, shocked than she was.

The thing was… for as long as Parker had known Eliot, he had always been a devout ladies man. But maybe she was overthinking it. Maybe he was just a really good actor and was really committed to this role?

Hardison was uncharacteristically quiet after that. But Parker didn’t dwell on it; she had a job to do after all.

— —

The job was a success. Parker knew it would be—heck they all knew it would be. When they came together to debrief, Sophie and Nate were suspiciously quiet about the whole polyamorous relationship shenanigans. But Parker, Hardison and Eliot never brought it up in their presence either.

Sophie and Nate left shortly after, leaving the three of them together in the team’s base.

The silence was awkward enough for Parker to actually notice, but it lasted for all of ten seconds before Hardison broke it. “You guys wanna watch a movie? I downloaded a bunch of new releases.”

Parker’s eyes lit up. “Do you have the new Ice Age?”

Hardison smiled, like he had predicted this question. “Of course.”

Parker reached over and high fived him.

“What about Fast & Furious 4?” Eliot asked.

Hardison hummed in confirmation.

“Sick.”

They settled on the big sofa with snacks. Hardison turned off the lights and, after a rock paper scissors contest to decide what they watched first, he loaded Fast & Furious onto the projector screen (Hardison’s newest contribution to their base).

Parker could understand the appeal of Fast & Furious 4 but she was more entertained by Eliot and Hardison’s reactions. They were both really immersed in it. They laughed, they gasped, they snorted. It was fun to watch them.

But she could think of something even funner and since she was in the middle, it would be even easier.

Tentatively, she brushed her pinky finger against the outside of Hardison’s thigh. It had an immediate reaction. His attention diverted from the movie straight to Parker.

Encouraged by the response, Parker spread her fingers across Hardison’s thigh and mouthed, “This okay?” He nodded and placed his hand over hers.

They sat like that for a few minutes, watching the film, but feeling more confident in her plan now, Parker leaned over to Hardison. “Wanna makeout?” she whispered in his ear.

Hardison’s eyes widened and he licked his lips, a movement not missed by Parker. “What about Eliot?” he whispered back.

“He can join in too. You want that, right?”

But Hardison frowned. “What do you want though?”

“Both of you, duh.”

“Oh.” Hardison grinned. “Cool. We’re on the same page then.”

Parker pressed a kiss to Hardison’s lips but withdrew quickly when she heard Eliot moving.

“Er. I’m gonna go,” he said and made to move. Parker was faster, though, and took hold of his arm. Eliot froze.

“Eliot,” Hardison said. “Join us?” There was a silent challenge in his tone.

Eliot’s eyes narrowed slightly as he glanced back and forth between Hardison and Parker. “Serious?”

Parker nodded.

“Wouldn’t joke about this,” Hardison said.

Eliot joined them.

What happened next that night was what Hardison would probably call brilliant. Fantastic. Amazing. And hopefully repeatable. But for Parker, she simply thought of it as right, like the last puzzle pieces slotting into place in a satisfying manner.

But then the morning came and conversations had to be had. Parker didn’t dread the conversation. In her mind the solution was straightforward. But she had an inkling it wouldn’t be so easy with the other two.

When she finally got up, Parker saw Eliot was already up drinking coffee, and by the time she was done in the shower, Hardison was up too. She watched them both, quietly, as they tried to play cool in each other’s presence but completely failed in doing so. Eliot and Hardison were hyper aware of one another and maintaining some distance, stealing glances when the other wasn’t looking.

Parker cleared her throat as she entered the kitchen. Eliot and Hardison immediately turned to her. “Morning,” she said. “Last night was fun. We should do it again.”

Eliot almost spat out his coffee while Hardison choked on his toast. After giving them a moment to recover, Parker tilted her head. “What? You don’t agree?”

Hardison put up a hand. “No, I never said that. It was definitely fun.”

“Yeah, it was,” Eliot added. “But…”

“But?” Parker prompted.

Eliot crossed his arms. “It can’t happen again.”

Parker gestured for him to continue. “Because…?”

“Because we work together!”

“That never stopped Nate and Sophie,” Parker pointed out.

“If you’re not comfortable with this, that’s okay too,” Hardison said, perhaps the sincerest Parker had seen him speak to Eliot.

Eliot groaned. “That’s just it! I don’t know what this is! What would we be? What happens if it goes pear-shaped? I just feel like I have a lot to lose here.”

Hardison narrowed his eyes at that. “What do you mean? Wouldn’t we all have the same to lose?”

Eliot’s cheeks reddened slightly. “I’m saying, dumbass, that when it comes to you two, I can’t do casual!”

Hardison’s eyes widened, but Parker beat him to respond. “It wouldn’t be casual for me,” she said. “Not with you guys.”

“Likewise,” Hardison said. “Also, that’s the first time I’ve had someone insult me and admit their feelings for me in the same sentence.”

Parker snorted. “Only Eliot.”

Eliot’s eyebrows were comically high as he looked back and forth at Parker and Hardison. “You guys are serious? How can you be so,” he waved his hand about searching for the word, “easygoing about it all?”

“Why wouldn’t we be? It’s just us three. Feels right,” Parker said, punctuated by a grin. Hardison nodded in agreement.

Parker leaned into Eliot’s space and put a finger on his chest. “Besides, you’ve got me curious now. Very curious.”

“Eliot’s blushing!” Hardison said, and he was right, Eliot’s cheeks had gotten even more red.

“Shut up.”

“Never. I want to take a picture of this moment and save it forever.”

Eliot sighed. “Don’t make me regret this decision.”

“So… that’s a yes? We’re all on the same page?” Hardison asked.

“On the same page about what?” came a fourth new but familiar voice. Nate, followed by Sophie.

“Where the hell did you come from?” Hardison asked.

Nate gestured to the front door. Parker’s eyebrows shot up. Had all three of them really been that distracted to have not noticed?

No, that couldn’t have been it.

“You never actually left last night. You just pretended to,” Parker said.

“Why?” Hardison said.

“Think it through, Hardison,” Eliot said.

Hardison’s eyes widened. “Oh, you two are gross!”

“No, no. Don’t jump to the wrong conclusions now,” Sophie corrected. “We left as soon as we heard moaning and came back several hours later.”

And, well, the admission was unexpected. But that was Sophie to a tee. Parker couldn’t help it but she burst into laughter. This whole situation was ridiculous but also hilarious. The others must have agreed because Hardison joined in the laughter, then so did Sophie, Nate, and Eliot.

When the laughter died down, Nate cleared his throat. “Do we need to set up some new rules or.. something? To manage this.”

Eliot and Parker said, “No.”

But Hardison didn’t. He said, “Actually, yes, we do. I’d like to set up a rule that bans Sophie and Nate from entertaining their voyeuristic tendencies around us.”

“Oooh, good one,” Parker said while Eliot nodded.

“Duly noted,” Sophie said.

“We’re not voyeurs!” Nate insisted.

“Keep telling yourself that, buddy,” Eliot said. He turned to Hardison and Parker, “Wanna go grab some breakfast?”

Parker grinned. “Yeah! I’m starving.”

“I could eat,” Hardison said.

The three of them left, ignoring Nate’s wails of, “Sophie, how could you let them think that of us!”

All in all, Parker would say her plan was a success, and who would’ve thought it would be attributed to bad acting?

Parker loved it when things worked out the right way.