Sasuke sighed. It was the third time this week he had stepped on Naruto’s dirty laundry and it was only Wednesday. He wondered what he had done to deserve such a messy roommate.
“Naruto! Stop leaving your dirty laundry everywhere,” he said before kicking a pair of Naruto’s jeans away. Naruto’s door opened.
“Hey, that’s not nice,” Naruto said, watching Sasuke kick his jeans. “What did my jeans ever do to you, huh?”
“They contaminated my lounge room, that’s what.”
Naruto rolled his eyes and grabbed the jeans from the floor before Sasuke could kick them again. “You’re such a drama queen.”
“And you’re a slob.”
“Hey! I’m not that messy,” Naruto said as he threw his jeans into his room. Sasuke had no idea where they landed, but knowing Naruto it was probably on top of a mountain of clothes.
“Then explain the kitchen,” Sasuke said and gestured to said area. It was a mess — as if a bomb had gone off. There were dirty dishes piled in the sink and on the bench, food crumbs all over the floor, empty wrappers everywhere, and leftovers left out. “I didn’t even know this level of mess was possible. But, as usual, you proved me wrong.”
Naruto rubbed the back of his neck. “Heh, yeah, sorry. I meant to clean it up last night but got a bit sidetracked by an assignment.”
Sasuke understood all too well, but he wasn’t going to give Naruto that much leeway. “I’m heading to work. It better be sparkling clean when I get home this evening. Or else,” he said.
“Aye aye, captain!”
Sasuke just raised an eyebrow. “Idiot,” he muttered as he picked up his bag and left the apartment.
Work was, well, work. He worked part-time at a music shop that claimed to be vintage. Sasuke didn’t hate it, but he did have a slightly low tolerance threshold for his co-workers. Most days he could tune them out by wearing headphones — the only job he would be able to do that in — but today was not one of those days.
Lee, an overly enthusiastic fitness fanatic who Sasuke worked with, was doing a dramatic reenactment of an Ed Sheeran song to impress Sakura, their other colleague. But Lee had yet to be successful with actually woo’ing her; if anything it seemed to have the opposite effect.
“How’s uni going?” Kakashi, his silver-haired boss, asked. His boss was always reading erotica in public, including right at that very moment. But apart from that he was a pretty chilled out guy who pretty much let Sasuke do whatever he wanted.
Sasuke put away the last disc in its case and stacked it upon the rest. “It’s going well,” he said.
“Glad to hear. Oh, before I forget. Your brother called the shop just before you arrived.”
Sasuke jerked his head up to meet Kakashi’s gaze. That was over an hour ago. “What for?” He checked his own phone, but there were no missed calls or messages.
Kakashi stroked his chin. “Think he said something about coming over for dinner at seven.”
Sasuke frowned. Why would Itachi not contact his number directly? Or maybe he tried but Sasuke was out of service — the train to work was notorious for losing signal. In any case, he needed to figure out what Itachi was up to. He closed out of his messages and noticed a new email notification. He tapped onto it.
Sasuke,
I’m in town this week and would like to catch up. I will see you at your place this evening at 7:00.
Regards,
Itachi
Sasuke cursed to himself. There was no point trying to negotiate with Itachi; if Itachi said he was going to come over, then that would happen whether Sasuke liked it or not.
It’s not that Sasuke didn’t like his brother — no, on the contrary he had a good relationship with his brother. It was just that… he could be a bit overbearing sometimes. When he wasn’t trying to recruit Sasuke to the family business he would, although well-intentioned, insist Sasuke do things his way because they were more ‘efficient’. But Sasuke liked to do things his own way and he especially did not like being told what to do.
Seeing Itachi at his place wasn’t the problem, though. Naruto’s mess was. The image of the filthy kitchen flashed in his mind. He couldn’t let Itachi see his place like that. He’d never hear the end of it.
Sasuke apologised to Kakashi and excused himself to go outside. He scrolled through his list of contacts until he landed on one titled ‘Moron’ and pressed call.
There was no answer though, just a voicemail message. Sasuke rolled his eyes. Typical. He needed Naruto to once in his life pick up. He tried again. Still no answer. He took a deep breath before trying a third time. It was picked up after the second ring.
“Sasuke?” came Naruto’s voice.
“You really should pick up your phone when it rings,” Sasuke said.
“I did! I got out of the shower just to answer your call. You should feel privileged.”
Sasuke rolled his eyes. “You thought it was your UBER Eats driver, didn’t you?”
There was silence and then “… No, of course not.”
Sasuke sighed. “Tell me. Have you cleaned the kitchen yet?”
“Not yet. Getting to it, though!”
Sasuke’s patience was wearing thin. “Well you better get onto it, Naruto! My brother is coming over. The last thing I need is to be lectured by him.”
“Hmm. That would be fun to watch, though.”
“Naruto…”
Laughter echoed through the phone. “I’m just winding you up. You need to lighten up, Sasuke. It’ll be clean for Itachi. Don’t stress.”
“It better be,” Sasuke said and hung up. He threw his head back and looked up to the sky. It was a warm winter’s day. It felt almost a shame to waste it in a basement-turned-music-shop. But the CDs weren’t going to arrange themselves, plus he hadn’t even started on the online orders yet. With much reluctance, he re-entered the store. He just really hoped Naruto would clean up his mess.
Sasuke finished his shift at six. It would take him forty minutes to get home, meaning he would only have twenty minutes to make sure everything was presentable, that included Naruto. Itachi usually brought food to make dinner, so Sasuke wasn’t worried about that.
As he waited on the platform for his train — five minutes it said, he received a Snapchat notification from Naruto. It was a selfie featuring Naruto holding up the peace sign with his fingers, only he had one of those stupid animal filters on. Yeah, Sasuke could acknowledge he looked cute, but he was more concerned about what was in the background.
Mess. A whole lot of it, judging by the looks of it. It was like the contents of the bins had been dispersed everywhere. What was Naruto doing? Sasuke inhaled and exhaled. It was fine. Everything would be fine. He would get home in time to clear up his incompetent roommate’s mess.
“Passengers on platform one, we are sorry to report that services may be delayed,” the announcer said. Sasuke wanted to bang his head against a wall. Just when he thought things couldn’t get anymore stressful.
He composed a text message to Itachi:
Train services are delayed. Can you come at a later time?
Whether Itachi would even read it was another matter entirely. The man had a penchant for leaving messages from him unread. Sasuke often hoped it was unintentional, but it probably wasn’t. When it came to Itachi every little action, or lack of, was calculated.
Sasuke composed a new message, this time to Naruto:
Clean your mess up or I’m kicking you out. I mean it this time.
He got a response almost immediately:
No you won’t. You love me too much. But stress less, for there is no mess! See what I did there? :eyes_emoji:
As much as he hated to admit it, there was truth in Naruto’s response — the first part anyway. Why did he put up with such a slob of a roommate? Because he was his best friend. Simple. Naruto’s good qualities far outweighed his not so good qualities. He’d helped Sasuke through some dark times and supported him even while he was fighting his own battles. Sasuke was grateful, but it wasn’t the right time to admit that to Naruto.
Instead, Sasuke typed out a quick reply:
Loser.
Fortunately the train was only delayed by five minutes. Unfortunately, it meant that it was more packed than usual. Sasuke stood by the door, cursing whoever it was that had the nasty body odour. When it finally reached his stop he’d never been so relieved to be in the fresh air, away from the sea of bodies. He checked the time on his phone. It was twenty to seven; home was just a ten minute walk away. Of course Sasuke ran it instead.
He made it in half the time and burst through the door with more force than necessary. But he was not ready for what awaited him. The house was so far spotless and definitely sparkling clean like Sasuke had requested. “Naruto?” he called out.
“Through here,” came Naruto’s voice.
Sasuke followed his voice around the corner, passing the tidy space that actually resembled a kitchen now, only to see Itachi and Naruto sitting on the carpet next to each other, with Playstation 4 controllers in their hands.
“Oh. Hello,” Sasuke said cautiously. Naruto and Itachi together was never a good sign. Last time he’d left them alone they had turned photos of him into stupid memes. Sasuke was just grateful none of them had gone viral online.
“Sasuke,” Itachi said, smiling his way. He placed the Playstation 4 controller down and walked past Sasuke into the kitchen, giving Sasuke’s shoulder a squeeze as he did. “Naruto and I made dinner.”
Sasuke was taken aback. “Huh?”
Naruto stood and smacked Sasuke’s butt as he passed him. “We made you dinner, butthead.”
Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the name. “Really? Butthead?”
“Yep. Go sit,” Naruto said while he helped Itachi serve the food.
Sasuke took a seat at their little round dining table as Itachi and Naruto brought the bowls over. It smelled good. Too good to be true. But when his bowl was put in front of him he couldn’t spot anything off. It just looked like spaghetti bolognese.
“Bon appetit!” Naruto said, with the worst French accent.
—
After Itachi left, Sasuke joined Naruto on the couch. The evening had been a success; Itachi had only attempted to recruit him to the family business once. Usually he was more persistent. Naruto had surprised him, maybe even impressed him, but he didn’t want that going to his head.
“You’re still an idiot,” he said to Naruto instead. He’d be a whole lot more impressed if Naruto could maintain the cleanliness.
Naruto just laughed. “I told you to lighten up! You get so cranky when you stress. You gotta have more faith in me.”
“Yeah, I know,” Sasuke said and dropped his head onto Naruto’s shoulder. They had a slow tempo playlist playing in the background. Naruto drummed his fingers along Sasuke’s thigh in time with the music. Sasuke enjoyed nights like this.
When the next song came on, Naruto stopped drumming his fingers and patted Sasuke’s leg. “Am I still a slob then?”
Sasuke didn’t hesitate to answer. “Yes.”
Naruto grinned and pulled Sasuke in for a noogie. Sasuke tried to pull away, but Naruto had a strong hold on him. Sasuke would get him back. He always did. In fact, he was already thinking of swapping the sugar out for salt.
Living with Naruto may have been slightly stressful at times, but Sasuke wouldn’t have it any other way.