revelations
Chapter Eight
Zoro didn’t realise just how much lighter he felt once Luffy awoke and left the infirmary, but it was much more than it had been with the other crew members. He took that as a good sign.
“Sanji! Your turn,” Luffy called out.
Sanji was by the railing, smoking as he watched the sea. He didn’t move from the spot. Luffy ran up to him.
“Did you hear me, Sanji? It’s your turn now!” Zoro shook his head. Everyone up to a mile away could hear you, Luffy, he thought. Still, Sanji made no effort to move.
“I heard you,” Sanji said, after taking another drag from his cigarette.
The deck quietened down as the crew members who were out there—Franky, Jinbei, Usopp, and Nami—turned their attention, expectantly, to Sanji.
Luffy tilted his head. “You’re not moving, though.”
Sanji exhaled, putting out his cigarette. “Listen—”
“Yes?” everyone on deck chorused. Their attention never wavered from Sanji.
“Okay, that’s kind of creepy. But uh… I don’t think me seeing the marimo will help. I actually think it might, uh, have the opposite effect,” Sanji said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Zoro narrowed his eyes on Sanji. What?
A laugh escaped Nami’s lips as she wandered over. “You’re kidding, right?” Zoro echoed the sentiment, despite the fact he and Nami rarely agreed on things.
Sanji shook his head. “No. I don’t want to undo all the good work you all have done.”
Nami huffed, unimpressed. “Please, you hardly even believe in it! Why don’t you be honest—you’re scared.” Sanji flinched. Nami took a deep breath, softening her tone. “But I’ve got news for you: we all are. I’m not gonna lie, it’s hard seeing him like that. When I was in there all I could think about was how weirded out Zoro would be if he saw me moping. So I put on a brave face and behaved like I usually would, because it was easier. And I maybe gave him a few wake up calls, but that’s whatever.”
Sanji frowned. “Nami-san… You’re saying I should pretend everything is okay?”
Nami groaned. “No! Ugh, sorry. What I’m trying to say is you don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with. You can go in there and stay quiet the whole time if you really want. But this curse that he has, it needs to know that you’re there for him. And right now, it doesn’t seem that you are.”
“She’s right, Sanji-san,” Jinbei said, sitting in his meditative pose.
Usopp popped up behind Luffy’s shoulder. “We know that your relationship is complicated but please do this,” he said, voice small.
The expression on Sanji’s face was hard to read. He looked torn.
Come on Cook, Zoro thought. You’re the last piece of the puzzle!
“Okay,” Sanji said, with a small nod. “I’ll do it.”
There were cheers all around and many fist bumps for Sanji. “You got this, bro!” Franky said.
Sanji smiled but Zoro had seen the expression often enough to know that it was bullshit. The man was nervous. But why?
The crew that were on deck followed him to the infirmary door. “Okay, I’m going,” Sanji said.
“Go, Sanji!” Luffy cheered.
Zoro floated past them all into the infirmary. He looked at his body lying there, unmoving, like it had for the past six days.
The door creaked open and Sanji stepped in. However, he took one look at Zoro’s sleeping form and stopped. “Nope! Can’t do this!” he said, and turned to leave. When he opened the door, though, he was face to face with the whole crew. Zoro would’ve laughed if he wasn’t so offended. Did the Cook really detest being with him that much?
“Uh.. hi?” Sanji said to the crew.
“Bye!” they chorused and closed the door in his face.
“Those meddlers, jeez,” Sanji said, turning away from the door. “I guess we’re doing this, marimo.”
“About time,” Zoro said, crossing his arms.
Sanji took a deep breath and took a seat on the wheely chair next to the bed. However, he still refused to look at Zoro’s face. Instead he placed his hands on the edge of the bed, inches away from Zoro’s wrist, and looked at them.
Zoro wondered what was going through the cook’s head.
Clenching his fists, Sanji cleared his throat. “I, uh, don’t really know what I should say, or whether I should even say anything. I just—when are you going to wake up, Zoro?”
Hearing his name on Sanji’s lips had been a new experience over the past few days. It was unfamiliar and felt strangely intimate and meaningful coming from the man who usually referred to him as marimo, but Zoro found he liked it.
“Soon,” Zoro replied. And how he hoped that was true. This had gone on long enough, and if Zoro were honest, he could see himself losing his sanity if he had to carry on much longer. His mental fortitude was strong, sure, but even the strongest could crumble given the right situation and pressure.
Sanji remained quiet. He brushed his pinky finger against Zoro’s, his movements hesitant, cautious, like it was something he was forbidden to do.
“You know, I thought I had hardened myself for these types of situations. I thought I would never go through the heartache I went through watching my mother’s condition deteriorate until she finally passed away. But, well.. Here we are,” Sanji said, a small laugh escaped him, the pain in it obvious.
“Sanji…”
“I had no idea when I joined this crew just how much everyone would mean to me.” He interlocked his pinky finger with Zoro’s. “You especially.”
Zoro swallowed, his throat feeling dry even in spirit form. There was a small smile on Sanji’s face, but his gaze remained fixated on Zoro’s hand.
“And I guess I just didn’t want to get my hopes up, like I did with my mother.”
Zoro frowned. “But I’m coming back, Cook. You can’t get rid of me that easily,” Zoro said.
Sanji shook his head, with a self-deprecating chuckle. “If you could hear or see me right now, you would probably be having a good laugh. I mean, we barely get along at the best of times and now I’m not coping because you’re not here.”
But Zoro didn’t laugh. It wasn’t funny in the slightest. It was actually kind of harrowing as a tightness formed in Zoro’s chest.
“But you’re the strong one. You always have been. As first mate, your presence on this ship has always been an unwavering constant. You’re part of the foundations, you carry us.” Sanji took a shaky breath. “But how can we go on if the foundations collapse beneath us?”
“Damn it, Cook! That’s not how it is at all!” Zoro said.
But Sanji couldn’t hear him, instead he wiped his glassy eyes. “God damn it.”
“You’re the one always looking out for everyone. You’re always saving us and stupidly sacrificing yourself. You’ve even created individual diet plans tailored to each crew member’s nutritional needs! If I’m the foundation then you’re the pillar that carries us to new heights,” Zoro said, feeling heated. He took a breath. “You got that, Cook?” But of course Sanji didn’t hear a word of it.
Sanji chanced a look at Zoro’s face, finally. “This whole thing… It’s just reminding me of Thriller Bark all over again.” He looked back down at his hands, clenching. “I’m just as powerless as I was then.”
That’s not true at all! Zoro wanted to yell at him. Were they even remembering the same occasion?
—
Zoro slowly got to his feet, wounded and beaten, but he couldn’t let this be the end for Luffy. Luffy needed to journey on, get stronger, and become the Pirate King. That was non-negotiable.
He begged Kuma to take his head instead of Luffy’s. And it appeared to be working, but then a certain blond-haired cook interrupted, trying to offer himself instead of Zoro. “You’re right about Luffy, but what about your dream?!” Sanji had said.
But it was when Sanji had his back to Zoro, was staring Kuma right in the eye, and said, “Hey, Zoro, give everyone my regards and start looking for a new cook.” That made Zoro see red. In a flash, Zoro was by Sanji’s side and stabbed the hilt of his sword into Sanji’s side with enough force to send an already injured Sanji to the ground.
“Not a chance,” Zoro muttered, as he gazed down at Sanji. There was no chance he was letting the cook do that. The cook was too strong, too important—it was imperative he survived.
In those few moments of consciousness after Kuma had transferred the pain from Luffy to Zoro, Sanji had found him. Zoro was covered head to toe in blood, and he could recall the cook asking him questions, but all Zoro could really think was, I’m glad it wasn’t you.
And then he passed out.
—
“You were never powerless,” Zoro said. “I knocked you out before you could even react.”
Watching Sanji now repeatedly clench and unclench his hands, Zoro was frustrated. The desire to hold those hands in his own, and relax Sanji’s movements, in reassurance that everything was going to be okay, was overwhelming.
But Sanji must have read his mind because he stopped clenching his hands and instead reached for Zoro’s hand. He hesitantly intertwined their fingers and flexed his fingers open and shut, like he was testing out how it felt. Seemingly satisfied, he let their hands drop back to the bed, staying connected. A small smile blossomed on Sanji’s face. One that Zoro had seen but a handful of times. It was the one Sanji kept guarded the most: bashful happiness—like he wasn’t sure he was allowed to enjoy this but did anyway. If there were ever a time to describe the cook as cute, now was it.
Zoro watched on, feeling his cheeks heat up. Oh, how he loved this man.
Zoro paused and backed up. Love? Huh? It should’ve been bewildering, perhaps a reality check of his current state of mind. But it strangely wasn’t. Instead it felt reassuring, satisfying, exciting, like the feeling of setting a new training personal best, but a lot better. But just like with training, the end result wasn’t particularly surprising, rather, it just felt inevitable.
Sanji was inevitable. Or more precisely, Zoro’s love for Sanji was inevitable. And the more he looked back on their time together, how could he have been so blind to the obvious?
An ocean of warm feelings washed over Zoro as he made sense of this revelation. He loved this man. This frustrating, hotheaded chef that gave Zoro sensory overload. So much made sense now.
Sanji sighed, his gaze fixated on Zoro’s face. He still hadn’t let go of Zoro’s hand. “Can I be honest with you, Marimo?”
Zoro nodded.
“I, uh, have liked you for a long time,” Sanji started. Zoro felt his heart starting to race, which was weird given his current form, but ignored it in favour of listening to Sanji. “I mean, real like, you know? I denied it and fought it for so long—it’s also why I have struggled this week. But, well, I think it’s time you know. Even if this is just a test run.”
Sanji smiled right at Zoro and there was a new spark to his eyes; he looked like he had resolved an inner conflict. “Because you will wake up. And when I tell you then I hope you don’t stab me in the face.”
Zoro’s heart was beating even faster.
“I love you, Zoro,” Sanji said.
Zoro blacked out.
But when his world lit up again seconds later, he was reaching out, reaching for Sanji. He wrapped his arms around Sanji and pulled him in close to his chest. “I love you, too,” he said, quietly.
He only had a fraction of a second to enjoy the sensation as it dawned on him, and Sanji too, that Zoro was back. Living and breathing! That was actually Sanji he was feeling! Those were Zoro’s hands holding onto him, not passing through him.
“Zoro!?” Sanji said, pulling back. His eyes were wide and so achingly honest with how relieved he was. Zoro’s eyes were just as wide, the grin never disappearing from his face. He pulled Sanji back in for another hug.
“Sanji,” Zoro said, taking in the feel of Sanji’s body against his. It was warm. It was solid. It was surreal. But most of all it was actually real. So very real and Zoro didn’t want the feeling to leave.
But it did and that was inevitable because the infirmary door flew open. “Zoro!” the whole crew yelled as they fought over trying to get into the limited space of the infirmary.
“Zoro’s back! I’m so happy!” Chopper cried.
“Happy you’re back with us, Zoro-bro!” Franky yelled, wiping tears from his eyes.
“You’re back in the land of the living, Zoro! Though, I suppose that’s wrong coming from a skeleton. Yohoho!” Brook joked.
“Welcome back, Zoro-san,” Jinbei said.
“Finally back to pay off your debts. Good,” Nami said, but sent a knowing wink his way.
“Glad to have you back, Zoro,” Robin said. She took one look at Zoro’s arms around Sanji’s waist and slipped Nami some cash.
“Zoro! I missed you, man!” Usopp said.
“We all did!” Luffy hollered, barging through until he was right next to Zoro. Sanji attempted to move but Zoro held onto him. They shared a look and Sanji settled. “You won’t believe how miserable it’s been without Zoro here!” Luffy said.
Zoro grinned. “It’s good to be back!” he said.
Chopper cleared his throat. “Okay, everyone clear out. I need to run vitals and it’s way too cramped in here. Everyone can catch up with Zoro shortly.”
Luffy groaned. “But Chopper—”
“No buts. Out! All of you!”
With a sigh, Luffy trudged out the infirmary door, the rest following suit.
“You too, Sanji,” Chopper said.
“Zoro, you have to let go of me,” Sanji said.
“Fine,” Zoro said. But first he tilted Sanji’s face his way and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “Mine,” he said and let go of the cook.
Sanji rolled his eyes, but the red of his cheeks told a different story. Zoro liked the look.
Chopper, with his medical equipment in hand, looked Zoro up and down. “Okay, let’s get you seen to!” Chopper said.
“Sure thing, little bro,” Zoro said, grinning as he finally managed to give Chopper that noogie.
“Ah! I definitely don’t like that! Not at all!” Chopper said, smiling despite his words. The familiarity settled in Zoro’s chest easily, like he hadn’t been unconscious for nearly a week.
It was good to be back.
↑ Top